So, its been a while since I last journaled on this site. I have been journaling but not on here. I have had a pretty intense hectic yr but thats not wat I wanted to write about.

Have you noticed how jaded we have all become? how much we doubt wat is staring us in the face? Been going through some things some pretty wonderful things and even though I feel happier than ever, I feel like its radiating from me, i feel like some of the people closest to me just don't see it or don't want to see it. maybe they are just afraid to see it. They are being cynical and don't want to admit that you are happier than they have ever let themselves be and then they make snide comments say cynical things. Why is it that un happy people would rather do their best to drag the happy down than try to make their own lives happier, I just wish that people could be honest to God happy for others. I know I have been jealous, I know I have wanted more or the convienence and ease others have and in the end I still do my darndest to be happy that they are happy.

Look out for your friends yes, but in the end say "i'm happy if ur happy" Why is it that me being this happy for the first time in my life makes so many people so unhappy. I truly hate that. You know I am not like you I don't take these things lightly and I am smarter about these things than you are and stronger than you think. Don't try to think you know me when really you are just projecting your own problems onto me. Just stop and let me be happy. Don't glare at me when I am in a good mood. Don't glare at me when I am sharing something that is exciting to me.

I think I will finish with, if you really understood how happy I was you wold understand how amazing it is and how much I really want you to find that.

Be happy with your life, be happy for other people and don't be a cynic